CATCHING UP WITH MYSELF
Down Time & Breathing Room
I have taken the past couple of days to catch up with my life…to catch up with myself. Lately it seems I have been running from one thing to the next. Long lists of tasks…so many things to take care of, details to attend to and check off the list. Some work related, some life related, lots mother related as we manage her life with her slide into dementia.
I have to say, I’ve been pretty good with self care…yoga, dance, walks and playing with my puppy, time with friends and family. And…I have forgotten how much time I need to space out!
I need day dream time. I spend so many hours “on” in my life, so many hours tracking, engaging, attending…bringing mindful awareness and the like – that I want to take a minute to speak up for day dreaming and spacing out! Can I get an “amen”!
The way my brain works really requires a few things that I have been reminded of this week.
#1) Unstructured, space out or “do nothing” time – this is so, so important…I would say for all of us. It is relieving for my mind and spirit…like something deep in my brain softens, finds space…relaxes and breathes..I can feel it.
It brings insight and clarity just because I have room to breath….not as an intention to ‘get clarity’ around anything in particular. Such good validation of the importance of this very underrated self care tool. My stress level goes way down and I find myself opening to ease and the creative.
#2) Organic task management – for me looks like a list of things I’d like to get to and no specific time or day anchor or ‘appointment’ to do it. Don’t get me wrong, I coach many clients to anchor their tasks to time and day, it is a valuable skill for effective functioning…especially for us ADD/ADHD folks.
And…I have to speak up for the satisfying experience of doing what calls me in the moment. It feels like such a satisfying art form! When I am indulging this way of being I sometimes move between 3 or 4 different activities within a chunk of time – all in process – all ‘unfinished’ and all organically progressing to completion.
I realize others might be irritated by this process, feeling I’m not completing anything…that is certainly the feedback I got when younger. This was usually followed by a requirement that I finish one task before I moved on to the next…a linear way of task management. I was not allowed to discover my whirlwind way of doing a number of things ‘at once’ (really I’m doing several things, one at a time, as you can’t really do more than one thing at a time). This organic fluid way of working somehow frees my mind and eases my stress – it almost becomes playful, floating from one thing to the next, following what ever catches my attention as I move through the house or through my work projects on my list.
I’ve come to understand that unstructured, space out time and organic task management dove tail together. I find that allowing for both can be both self care, unplug time and a potent way to address many things. For example, with writing this LoveNote – I stopped to use the restroom, realized I wanted to throw some laundry in, take my vitamins, take the dog out, where I reflected on this writing and returned to it.
I see it as broad circles of activity, reflection, day dreaming, and so on. I find it way more kind, creative and productive than trying to pound out a list of tasks when I’m just not in the mood.
I coach clients through this way of being “productive” when they say “I need to focus more, I need to be more productive” – on further exploration, they are already doing more than their personal bandwidth can hold and driving for more. They need self care, maybe to space out, have some chill time, day dream…then follow what is calling them, what is interesting to do. To do what has a charge to it, like it is speaking to you. Then stay open to what calls your attention next…and so on.This is a powerful invitation to work from an inspired place…we are inviting inspiration when we create and protect a spacious way of working, being and trusting things will get done. Wide circles of permission, trust and time. Wide circles of permission – that feels so good and so right. If this way of being is calling to you as you read, I hope you give yourself permission to follow it.
Permission to space out, day dream and follow what calls you. This, coupled with organic ‘task management’ could change your life. Revolutionary. Let me know how it goes if you allow this beautiful self care / task care practice.
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Oh dear Shannon – a big AMEN to you wise words! I am deeply grateful that I take the time for flow in my life today. It is such a gift.
Sweet Marla – thank you for sharing…I keep learning and remembering and sharing as I go. Big love. S